I tell you it’s hard work. Being a mum in 2017 is REALLY hard work.
It’s not the looking after the children – it’s the keeping up with them and all the ‘in’ things especially the manner of speaking.
In my days, ‘Sick’ meant you were unwell or as we grew older – ‘Don’t be sick’ meant that what the person was saying made you want to puke. Much like a ‘sick joke’.
Now, a fashionable shoe is ‘Sick’ meaning it’s very ‘in’. And it’s not said like ‘Sick’, it’s more like ‘Siiiick’ with a special lilt making it sound like a different word. Which it isn’t.
Or the ‘Dibs and Bags’ and even the ‘Dibsies and Bagsies’ (Hope I got the spelling right) I thought they mean the same thing. But now when you use it, it seems to mean like a ‘double bag’. As if ‘dibs’ is not enough.
I’m always hearing ‘ I dibs and bags’ the chocolate doughnut. Well, there is only one and you can’t just say it and get it. You need to be there first. Not shouting it out from upstairs while the others are already at the table waiting to choose theirs. Unfortunately, the ‘Dibsies and Bagsies’ are honoured and no one touches the chocolate doughnut.
And the DAB – which apparently I do wrong every single time. I have a pretty strong theory on how it came about.
I think it was just some teenager trying to hide their face at a disco because they were not supposed to be there and they’ve just just seen their squealer cousin walk in who may report to the parents.
And now it’s a dance step! Can they jive or waltz? No!
And ‘what the’ is sort of swearing. Just because you don’t complete it, it doesn’t mean ‘what the hell’ it means ‘What the f***’. There’s a world of difference in the ‘the’ you see. One is ‘What the hell’ with ‘the’ being pronounced properly and the other one is more like ‘da’ and we all know that the word that follows is not hell or fudge. And ‘wtf’ falls in the same category by the way.
And No! No one says ‘Oh fudge!’ either. I pretty much know what you’re saying.
I’m also not supposed to be cool.
The other day, my daughter, was peeping over my shoulder while I was typing a text in answer to someone and I said ‘ Yeah, right’ Mums don’t use the word ‘Yeah’ in texts I was told. And yes, I also don’t say ‘OK Cool’ when she tells me she’s a bit late from being out with her friends. It’s not done!
Well I Do. And I AM SO ‘SICK’!